I put make up on for this?
So i've been trying to take the high road, keep a positive outlook on all this dating crap and not using it as a good reason to dust off my writing skills....but alas I find my experiences far too humorous to keep to myself.
It has been a very long time since I have started to date. If you were not aware and are a total stranger, I had gotten back together with an ex around Christmas time of 2011. Making my intentions very clear to him it was clear to me that he wasn't in fact the one around August of 2012. Therefore, once again I am SINGLE IN THE SUBURBS. This time with friends!
It took a few months to get the courage to jump on the horse so to speak, and it feels like a whole new game out there this time around. Still a little hung up on the idea of my past relationship but trying really hard to let go of my ideals of what never was, i delve head first into dating again. These are my most recent stories to share:
MR. GOLF
A few years older now and still just as hopeless, I went on a date with this guy, let's call him Mr.Golf?...our first date was AMAZING. Perhaps the best I have ever been on. We went to a free comedy show in Malibu and enjoyed some wine and laughing. After the show we snuck out onto the golf course, wine in hand and he invited me to lay with him on the green to look at the stars. In a haze of first date bliss I oblige. We have great conversation and finally get up to walk back to discover the lights were all out and everyone had closed up and left. With only the moon light to guide us we sneak back through the bushes to find ourselves standing under an arch and dozens of chairs; they had setup for a wedding the day after. Sharing a laugh together we say our goodbyes and a great appropriate first date kiss.
This date was back in November and we have since been on a couple dates together but each one less spectacular than the last. I guess when a first date is so amazing it is hard to live up to the magic! Mr. Golf has since left the building once and for all since I saw his real-life self on our last date and he is not as well put together/successful/mature as I once believed.
i've had some random first dates here and there and some went very well but nothing came of any of them. It's weird. Some guys will make it seem like they had a great time and tr to plan another date but then never reach out again. This day and age when communication is SO easy, why is it NOT so easy for some?
I hate when you feel a super strong connection with someone but then nothing ever comes of it, geographical complications or the fact that he doesn't want a relationship (ie: he just ins't that into you, because if he were he'd make an exception!).....
MR. ROLLING STONE
I knew of Mr. Rolling Stone back in high school and he even dated one of my friends for a hot second over 10 years ago...I met him randomly at a bar after a kickball game on a Monday and we started talking and really hit it off. He was leaving the following day for 10 weeks to travel but I felt a connection to him and it was intense. 10 weeks later he keeps his promise and we hang out again. only in town for Christmas and to be leaving 2 days later, we don't have much time again to see each other but again the strong connection is there and I am left to just wonder what our kids would look like someday...LOL!
No idea when he will be returning again but or if it will be more than 1-2 days, but I get random "i miss you" texts, which is nice to know he still thinks of me. I could never live such distant lives but he is nice to think about too from time to time.
I am looking for someone normal. Someone motivated, ambitious, loyal and fun. Humor is huge for me too. I need someone available, someone who wants to be with me, makes time for me. I don't think it's too much to ask for...This bring me to Mr. Kickball.
MR. KiCKBALL
Don't get me wrong, "Kickball" is NOT a derogatory term in this case. I LOVE kickball and play in a couple leagues, actually. This "nickname" is purely for shock value.
My first date with Mr. Kickball was a little unconventional. It started slow at a bar, playing darts. e was so nervous and fumbily he actually spilt his beer not once but twice. He seemed so sweet and adorable but nearing the end of our 2nd game of darts, I was getting over the shy/nervous act. It is attractive for a guy to think you are special and get nervous around you but it gets old fast for someone to dote so much. But, we were having a good time and he seemed super sweet and into me. Something I havent experienced much of. During our first date i get a text from friends having a small get together at their house and I invite Mr. Kickball to join me. Why not delve right in and see if he is compatible with my friends? They are a HUGE part of my life and approval is required for anything to further than a 2nd date....the night went well, everyone was laughing and having a great time. We drank more than we should have and ended up sleeping over at the house. Now, don't get the wrong idea...nothing like THAT happened. Mr. Kickball hung out most of the next day and then again the day after. It just so happened I was doing random things that week that he asked to join in on like going on a hike....by the 4th day Mr. Kickball was talking about spending forever with me, talking about the future etc. It got way too intense way too fast and I put the brakes on! Mr. Kickball had signed up to play on my team for kickball which started in just a couple weeks, presuming we would be a couple by then or something. Because of this I couldn't just stop texting him back, I had to attempt to be his friend and the fact my friends liked him hurt my chance of cutting him out completely. The more he hung out, the creepier he became. He was overly obsessed with me, wanting to spend ever day with me, texting me non stop. One day he knew he was being too clingy, the next he would be apologetic and then whiny about how he missed me. He found out where I worked and sent flowers, which would be super sweet if I was into the guy as much as he was into me....it just dded to the creepy stalker feeling in the pit of my stomach. Trying to stay friendly, I invite him over for a Saturday night get together after explaining we are nothing more than friends. He agrees but once he gets there and gets me alone he pleads his case again. I literally had to yell at him "WE ARE JUST FRIENDS"! A gluten for punishment I suppose, he asks if he can join us for Superbowl the following day....Superbowl with all my friends, thinking in the group setting it should be ok and he could finally see that I just wanted to be friends with him. He drank far too much and wanted to drive...when we all tried to stop him he finally gave up his fight and got out his guitar (he randomly had in his car)....I had once told him I thought guys who could play were sexy....problem is, he only knew one song; "What Child Is This", that Christmas song, and he swore that it wasn't a Christmas song but rather some old folk song...? When we finally said goodbye he attempted to kiss me yet again and I had to stop him, tell him once more that we were just friends... It grew worse and worse until the first day of kickball. He showed up and I tried to keep my distance. Other players were asking me why he was staring at me the entire game....I thought he finally understood we were just friends when he said he wasn't going to make it out to the bar after the game, kind of whining about how it was hard to be around me and not being able to hug or hold me...My girlfriend grabs my phone and texts :..grow up" as if she is me, but then he showed up anyway. Not to ask me why I would text such a thing but he just sat down at m table and smiled at me. I had had enough at this point and go about my business of socializing with friends while m girlfriend who is also fed up at this point tells him that he is being creepy and that I don't want to hang out anymore. He finally leaves. Texts me that night to say he would like another chance and I tell him as nicely as possible that i think it is best if we just remain friends and not get romantically involved. While we spent a lot of time together that first weekend, I am not interested in him as he is me and I hope that we can still be cordial at kickball, since he signed up to pay on my team and all, for the next 5 weeks! His response is telling me how much he cared for me (PAST TENSE) and that he could never be with me...unless I change my mind and wanted to.
MR. HUSKY
I received an odd message on my match.com account one night..."You pictures are dumb".
Firstly, nu-uh! My pictures show my personality, my interests, my life, and my life is not dumb, it's awesome. I get a ton of compliments on them, actually! Secondly, who write that to someone?!!? Not being offended easily, this guy hit me where it hurt and while i would normally not respond to such crap, I engaged out of fear spite. This guy must like bitchy me because he ended up asking me out, er, well to get a drink because he felt bad for insulting me. While I am sure this is a tactic used before by him and many others, it worked because I wasn't doing anything on the Tuesday night in which he invited me out and was curious enough, mostly because he was that Caucasian looking greek type in his pictures and all I could think of was John STAMOS? LOL....I was sadly mistaken in my assumption of the Caucasian-greek mix...Stamos you beautiful bastard, you strike again. Mr. husky was much older and Italian looking than his pictures and right away I knew I would have to smile through this date while grinding my teeth. This was a guy who thought he was funny, who was IN LOVE with his husky puppy (even pretending she was sitting next to him at one point and was talking to her and petting the air)... and he found me more attractive the bitcher I became, which came naturally with the vodka. Thankfully we went to a place where I knew the bartender. I gave him my signature HELP ME look and he made my drink extra strong. (Dont worry, I drank 3 glasses of water after said drink before I drove home!)...I am really trying now though and attempting to see the good in people without so much first date judging. But...he said "girl" like one of those SNL characters 52 times (ya, I counted) and he had a hard time giving a compliment unless it was about himself and I found myself laughing a lot but not at his "jokes" as I lead him to believe but rather just at him in general. He was so random and odd, I didn't know what he was talking about half the time, giving scenarios such as "Would you cook and clean when we live together" or "How much do want weekly?" Was I on an interview to be his live in maid or a date?....He did pay while I demanded to pay the tip, he walked me to my car but didn't lean in for the kiss but did lean in toward my car to see what was inside and make remarks while asking for a 2nd date...."I know how to get a hold of you if I want to" was my reply and he took that as a good comment with his wink, smile, finger gun reply.
OOOppps. I just lost his number.
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