It is VERY important to get your friends' approval of a potential mate, however should it be a deal breaker?
I have a super close group of friends and their approval means the world to me. Afterall, most weekends and holidays are spent with them and the guy I end up with will need to meld well with my group of friends. I was thinking today though of all the guys I dismissed prematurely perhaps based solely on the premise that a friend didn't like them for one reason or another. Their thoughts have a huge influence on my decisions and while I know I ultimately make the choice, should their "thumbs down" be enough to not pursue a man or to end a relationship?
People can grow on you over time, sure...and a first impression can be totally false, I know this but when a friend has such a strong opinion of a guy I MIGHT be interested in, I have to take that into consideration because I know they have my best interests in mind. Friends can come and go too and while I believe the group I have now will be lifelong relationships, I too am searching for my life partner.
My bestie is married with kids and I am her reason to go out when she needs it; I am her right hand helper with the kids when I am there and she is my soul mate. I am sure she has not liked some of the guys I've dated or have been interested in for somewhat selfish reasons but I know her thoughts, advice and criticisms come from a place of love. Me finding someone would mean less time with her and I don't necessarily want that, so I need to find someone who is okay with this and hopefully gets along with her husband well enough so that I don't have to worry about feeling guilty for always "ditching" him to hang with her. Somewhat selfish on my part, I get that but being older and "wiser" and knowing my way around the dating pool and relationship realities I have to take these things into consideration.
One girlfriend might like the guy I am seeing while the others think he is "too old" for me or "doesn't have a good enough job" or "just looks weird with [me]". The criticisms really never end so how does one filter and decide what friends to listen to and which ones to ignore? It is easy to "say listen to your heart or gut or intuition" and "make up your own mind/decision" but when you are so close to people you spend the majority of your non working hours with, you have to listen to them a little, right?
How important do you think your close friends approval is when dating?
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